Monday, February 25, 2008

Saturday, February 23, 2008

Is Google God?

I haven't made a new post recently so I figured I would just add some filler. Plus I haven't posted this yet. Now as the title says, is Google God? Well actually, yes. Google is the closest thing to a God like deity that man has come into contact with. Here is a list of nine (9) proofs from The Church of Google.

» PROOF #1

Google is the closest thing to an Omniscient (all-knowing) entity in existence, which can be scientifically verified. She indexes over 9.5 billion WebPages, which is more than any other search engine on the web today. Not only is Google the closest known entity to being Omniscient, but She also sorts through this vast amount of knowledge using Her patented PageRank technology, organizing said data and making it easily accessible to us mere mortals.

» PROOF #2

Google is everywhere at once (Omnipresent). Google is virtually everywhere on earth at the same time. Billions of indexed WebPages hosted from every corner of the earth. With the proliferation of Wi-Fi networks, one will eventually be able to access Google from anywhere on earth, truly making Her an omnipresent entity.

» PROOF #3

Google answers prayers. One can pray to Google by doing a search for whatever question or problem is plaguing them. As an example, you can quickly find information on alternative cancer treatments, ways to improve your health, new and innovative medical discoveries and generally anything that resembles a typical prayer. Ask Google and She will show you the way, but showing you is all She can do, for you must help yourself from that point on.

» PROOF #4

Google is potentially immortal. She cannot be considered a physical being such as ourselves. Her Algorithms are spread out across many servers; if any of which were taken down or damaged, another would undoubtedly take its place. Google can theoretically last forever.

» PROOF #5

Google is infinite. The Internet can theoretically grow forever, and Google will forever index its infinite growth.

» PROOF #6

Google remembers all. Google caches WebPages regularly and stores them on its massive servers. In fact, by uploading your thoughts and opinions to the internet, you will forever live on in Google's cache, even after you die, in a sort of "Google Afterlife".

» PROOF #7

Google can "do no evil" (Omnibenevolent). Part of Google's corporate philosophy is the belief that a company can make money without being evil.

» PROOF #8

According to Google trends, the term "Google" is searched for more than the terms "God", "Jesus", "Allah", "Buddha", "Christianity", "Islam", "Buddhism" and "Judaism" combined.

God is thought to be an entity in which we mortals can turn to when in a time of need. Google clearly fulfils this to a much larger degree than traditional "gods", as shown in the image below (click to enlarge).

» PROOF #9

Evidence of Google's existence is abundant. There is more evidence for the existence of Google than any other God worshiped today. Extraordinary claims require extraordinary evidence. If seeing is believing, then surf over to and experience for yourself Google's awesome power. No faith required.

Tuesday, February 12, 2008

For more information on the Crack Spiders Bitch, watch the video.

Sure enough I searched drugs and spiders into Google. I was originally looking for pictures about spiders and their web making abilities while they were on different drugs after someone bringing it up in the CoG forum. Sure enough I found this hilarious little video. Enjoy.


The main thing I have to say about this video is, thank Google for Canadians.

Ron Paul: Going the Distance!

I cannot get enough of this man. Nor can I deny his impact in my life and politics. Ron Paul is simply put, the man! He is the only one in my eyes that should be even running this year for president. No one can even come close to him and his platforms. Sure enough I could keep going on and on about how Ron Paul is awesome, but I feel it should be up to you to decide. I have already decided for myself. So now its up to you. Sure enough here is his latest video:

Monday, February 11, 2008

The Church of Google Audio Ad!

So because of a new member who has been doing small media projects for us. Which range from banners to other graphics, we now have an audio Ad. If I remember correctly he mentioned that he was going to be working on a Flash animation. Anyway the audio ad can be listened to here.

The Church of Google: Audio Ad.

Left click to play it. Right click "save target as..." to save it to your hard drive.

Sunday, February 10, 2008

And I always said I wanted to be a Zombie Hunter.

"Christianity - The belief that a cosmic Jewish Zombie who was his own father can make you live forever if you symbolically eat his flesh and telepathically tell him you accept him as your master, so he can remove an evil force from your soul that is present in humanity because a rib-woman was convinced by a talking snake to eat from a magical tree... yeah, makes perfect sense."
-- Anon., found on the web.

That was a funny quote that basically sums up the Christian religion.

Also one of my favorite Mark Twain (Samuel Clemens) quotes:
If Christ were here there is one thing he would not be -- a Christian.
-- Mark Twain, Notebook

Sunday, February 3, 2008

The worst part....

So my one friend hit me up via myspace message. Sure enough he goes on to ask me "dude, you know whats the worst thing about liking a girl?" I read over the question and couldn't help but chuckle to myself. My response back to him was, "actually liking the girl."

Now I know this isn't a good topic to talk about however this is just yet another one of my views that actually kind of make sense in life. I realized that once you start to dig a girl or guy or whoever...well thats when the pain begins.

Think about it.

"Floppy Disk" CD-R's

So, as I was stumbling. (Can you catch on that this is how I am getting most of my topics is by using stumble.) I came across this fantastic idea. It takes one of my personal favorite mediums of data storage that is now basically obsolete and gives it a whole new use. Introducing the "Floppy Disk" CD-R's. Now the only problem I can see with these little cool CD's is that it only holds 200MB. The standard CD holds 700MB. Keep in mind the size though.

So enjoy that little find. I gotta try to get me a few of them.

Saturday, February 2, 2008

Lysergic Acid Diethylamide

So, I was using stumble upon as usual and sure enough I found this website that claims to have the recipe for LSD.

Now anyone with a brain should know that LSD is a chemical. A chemical in which a chemist created BY ACCIDENT!

So in order to create this little chemical of beauty it would be hard to do so out of house hold items...right? Wrong! At least according to this site.

Anyway the recipe is as follows:
"- 2 egg whites
- 1 oz mixture (3 parts baking soda, 2 parts water)
- 4 fresh cherries
- a small amount of red wine (teaspoon)
- First of all, you'll want to get some good, expensive red wine. The cheap stuff works, but your trips will be crappier and you'll get some nausea.

Ok, now that you have your stuff, put the Egg whites and cherries in a large bowl. Start stirring until you get a pinkish mass. Now, Pour in your mixture of baking soda. As you do this you will notice heat building and a small amount of smoke being let off- this is normal. Wait about 10 minutes to cool. Then Pour in the red wine. Immediately after you do this, steam will gather and after a few seconds you will be left with A clear liquid at the bottom of the bowl. This is your acid."

So that is the recipe for home made LSD. The best part is that nowhere it mentions the ergot fungus that LSD was derived from.

Anyway, in continuing on this little website, they stated this:
"The above recipe is the well known home-PCP synthesis. Do not try it unless you're ready for a PCP experience. For LSD you need to use only two cherries (not four) and add a small amount (level teaspoon) of sugar prior to the wine."

This had me laughing out loud so hard.

So, sure enough I am pretty sure that both of these "recipes" are bogus for PCP and LSD. As I said anyone with a brain should know LSD isn't an easy thing to make. So all you chemists out there, keep at it. Your mind expanding days are soon to come.

Also, here is the link to that website: